About

My name is Nicola Taylor and I am a Drama Queen. I have a penchant for tantrums and emotional highs, hats and big earrings and bad language. Two years ago I found myself at a crossroads. Outwardly I had a successful career, took fabulous holidays in posh hotels and ate in great restaurants, with a fabulous handbag on my arm. Inside I was falling apart.

I was thirty and still recovering from a brutal divorce three years earlier that shook my faith in humanity and my own judgment. I had just ruined another relationship with a man I loved more than I could ever show him. My friends, while wonderful, were mostly preoccupied with getting married and having children. I couldn’t go ten minutes without checking my Blackberry. I was constantly anxious. My bones ached, the bags under my eyes were getting tougher to disguise and I was ill all the time. My job and my attachment to the drama were slowly killing me.

I had a choice. I could stick with this life and hope it got better. Maybe I’d earn enough money to quit my job and do something else. Maybe I’d meet someone who would accept the drama queen within. Maybe I’d be truly happy one day. But I couldn’t see how. Every year was the same. Conferences in February, May, September and November. Long hours. Six to eight weeks of crazy business travel, then company earnings, when things were so busy I could barely make time to go to the bathroom. Repeat four times and the year was done. Entire seasons would pass without me even noticing. I was numb, just blocking out the miserable thought of another twenty to thirty years of this.

So I started a quest to create a better life for myself. I took the little scraps of free time I had, the odd weekend I didn’t travel and my vacation time, and I started to do the things I’d always wanted to. I took photography courses, I learned to surf and sail and draw and sing. I wasn’t always good at everything but I could feel something deep inside of me breathing a sigh of relief. I met lots of new people, some of whom were also the tragic singleton in their social circles. And together we made each other stronger.

I liked who I was becoming but I couldn’t see how I could continue to grow while still working in a job that left nothing in my life as sacred. Anything and everything could be and should be sacrificed for my career. I realised that, if that was what having a career meant, I didn’t want it. So I got a life coach and tried to figure out what I really wanted to do. I became greedy for a life of passion and purpose and in April this year, in a grand gesture of drama, I quit my job. I don’t know what I’m going to do next. I’m currently studying photography and teaching a bit of yoga, while I figure it all out.

But what I really noticed, and what has given me the strength and the belief to carry on when I’ve been scared, is the ripple effect of my choices. I never expected that anything I did would influence anyone but the people around me began to question their own choices. They began to ask me for advice. They would tell me that they didn’t believe that anyone really enjoyed their work and, when I said that I absolutely disagreed, their faces would light up with hope. And hope is such a powerful thing. It was missing from my life two years ago but I’ve got buckets of it now. I believe that we can all find peace and fulfillment and joy in our lives. I believe that we can change the world in the supermarket queue, by knowing our own drama and not allowing it to hurt others. I believe that we can change the world by being our best selves, by being brave and open and vulnerable. And I believe in hope. I may be disappointed. I may get it wrong. I may lose sometimes. I may not get the things I want out of life, but I choose to hope anyway.

I would love to hear from you. What are your dreams? Your hopes? Are you scared? Are you on your path? You can reach me at nicola@dramaqueensguide.com