Ending things is ridiculously tough. Whether it’s a relationship that isn’t working for us, a job that is less than we hoped or a friendship that’s past its sell by date, it’s not easy to let something go. We get caught up in what we’re leaving behind, rather than what we’re going towards. We’re moving away from the known, into the unknown. And that’s a scary prospect.
I always get bummed out around this time of year. August is my birthday month and so it brings up a lot of reflection on the past year. It’s also the last month of Summer. The days start to get noticeably shorter and we have to accept that the best of the season is behind us. My 32nd year is about to end and I think it’ll be a year I remember for the rest of my life. I made dramatic changes to the way I live. I stepped into my own power and started to direct my life, instead of just reacting to it. Incidentally, my 31st year was also pretty awesome. My 30th year sucked ass, but that’s another post. I think it’s interesting (and a little sad) that I’ve never used my birthday as a reason to look forwards, a reason to think about the things I want to achieve in the upcoming year, the ways I want to feel. I’ve always given precedence to what is ending, leaving little room for what is beginning. Isn’t that a shame?
I’m resolving to spend some time this week visualising the year ahead. Whenever I start talking about visualisation Mr B rolls his eyes, but I really believe in this. It creates focus, and it pumps energy into your dreams, and that’s really powerful. So I’m going to be visualising myself, at the end of my 33rd year. What I’ll be doing, where I’ll be living, who I’ll be living with. And I’ll distill all of this, using Christine Kane’s Word of the Year tool to come up with a word to represent how I want to feel in my 33rd year. If you haven’t checked out Christine’s website you really should. She’s an absolute superstar and incredibly inspiring. I meant to do this at the beginning of 2010 but actually it feels right for me to do it around my birthday instead because, for me, that’s the time when I take stock.
So, what if we could drop our attachment to the end and focus on the beginning instead? How great would that feel? Our lives are constantly evolving. Things change. Things pass. And they need to, in order to create space for something new. Where are you holding onto something that is ending? And how is that preventing you from opening up to what is beginning?
“You are living and dying simultaneously. This is the story of our aging consciousness. It is both the beginning and the end. It is a paradox of our existence and it gives me reason for hope.”
Matthew Sanford – Waking: A Memoir of Trauma and Transcendence.
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{ 3 comments }
Scary with a capital “S”
Can’t wait to find out what your word of the year is! Please do a blog post on that.
Coming right up. As soon as I figure my word out, of course!
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